AUDE FLYER 04/2005

SOh come on, this is just getting silly now. There is only so long one can extemporise on the virtues of heart warming stew, and joy of radiator warmed socks etc...should be going on about daffodils and bird song in Wordsworth fashion, not wimpering about how bloody freezing it is still. Well it seems as though most of Europe is locked into a fridge with a broken thermostat at the moment. We’re not the only ones.

Last week we well and truly joined the French community and got…a dog. Well actually I did. Mark was in Britain, and it was an evil and dastardly thing to do to him. Ezra and I had been suggesting for a long time that a dog would be nice. It would provide exercise in the form of long healthy walks, it would eat all the scraps, guard the house, wash the car etc etc. He was not overly enthusiastic. Trapped with Ezra during an interminable 2 weeks holiday of filthy weather we both decided it would be fun to just go and look…..

First stop, the S.P.A at Carcassonne. Freezing day with a wind straight from the Russian Steppes, cages filled mainly with wild eyed hounds as big as cows, great for guarding the domaine but not for a small house in Limoux with resident cat. Next the S.P.A at Lezignan. A strangely different set up. A very nice lady invited me to look in the window at the various photos of dogs and then to come in and ask me what we were looking for. It was rather like dog estate agent….how many legs do you require? What level of woofage had you in mind. It was rather difficult to tell what sorts of hounds were represented so we went in and talked to her. Something small, easy to maintain, a whippet perhaps? Err whippet se quoi ca? We looked on the dog chart and decided on a few possible models around a basic whippet shape. She then said perhaps I would like to visit a dog that might be appropriate. The system, which is a very good one, is that the dogs are housed with temporary families, so they have a nicer time and the character of the dog can be assessed. We drove round to a neat pink bungalow and were greeted by a mad flailing white and tan whirlwind. (the dog not the lady). Ezra cowered behind the lady’s sofa and I went through a similar thing to when one is shown into a dark brown 1970’s nightmare house on an estate agents visit. You want to go immediately but find you are helpless and trapped listening to someone saying “geometric orange wallpaper is really IN at the moment” or “this could be a very nice taxidermy room”. Actually when the dog calmed down a bit I could see he was very sweet, but just too big, hairy and noisy…. and would probably find the cat tasty.

The next day it was still dark grey and vile outside so we thought we would have one more look, this time at Narbonne ‘Chenil”. This is bigger and more scary than the S.P.A’s. There was a big outside pen, mainly full of the vast angry dogs. There was a rather endearing very low sort of dog with a friendly beardy face but his bark would I think have disturbed our already long-suffering neighbours. We then ventured into a huge dark hanger like building. The noise was incredible. We walked between cages down a long passage with huge barking dogs on either side, a bit like the scene out of ‘silence of the lambs’ I half expected to find a very sinister dog standing on its hind legs at the end behind a panel of thick glass, savouring a glass of Chianti.

It was in fact a cage with three small black dogs, two, a fury of fur and barking, and the third….a silent black whippet. Well we had to really…. Paid the 80 e for the jabs etc, and drove back with a very sweet and at that point, smelly dog. Took her to ‘mag dog’ for a professional wash, dry and nail clipping and well that was it really. She settled in very well, couple of ‘accidents’, the cat took no notice except to try and get into the new dog bed, then we just had wait for Mark to return. He, as I expected, took it all in his stride like the generous and warm hearted person that he is………

Now being a cat and dog owner I feel I can really appreciate the Jack Dee observation following….

The difference between cats and dogs.

You are putting up shelves, the cat is looking at you as if to say “you’re doing it all wrong, stupid ****

The dog is looking at you as if to say “I don’t know what you’re doing, but I love you”

By the way, thinking about one of my earlier letters ….

We ARE picking up all the dog deposits! And are going to start a ‘Dog poo bins for Limoux campaign.’

‘Una’ has also been a wonderful asset in increasing our ‘chatting’ with people in Limoux. Where once one might have just exchanged a bonjour, now we have long prolonged conversations about what sort of dog she is, what happened to her leg, which is a good question (it was odd before we got her!) and where her rather fetching jumper came from.

Talking of dogs…..a friend has two that need a new home.

The family are moving from a house in the country with a lot of land to a house in Limoux with no garden. They have two large dogs that can not move with them, due to the lack of garden. The dogs are excellent for guarding a house, they look and sound SCARY and would put off any burglar. Apart from the appearance, they are actually good family dogs and great with children

If any one would like to give ‘Rough’ and ‘Tumble’ a home, please contact: Claire 04 68 69 59 80.

Right. Must get off the sofa, where I am writing this horizontally due to bad back and hobble round the streets with the dog and a plastic bag.

Here’s looking forward to some sun,

Salut, Kate.